For the man who wants to be good at being married. And the woman who sent him here.

Start with a three minute quiz.
There's a version for him and a version for her.

If you’re him

It’s 10.40pm on a Tuesday. The kids are down. She’s on one end of the couch with her phone and you’re on the other with yours.

You love her. You’ve done more work on yourself than any man in your family ever has. And when she’s upset, you can’t escape that familiar pattern of defensiveness and closure.

The work you’ve done is real. But so is the disconnection in your relationship, and that makes the pattern harder to break.

If you’re here because of him

You’ve said it kindly. You’ve said it loudly. You’ve left the book on his side of the bed.

Nobody can make him do anything. What I can tell you is that a man will often hear from another man what he can’t hear from the woman he lives with. You may not like that. But it is true.

Take the quiz yourself. Then send him his version and ask him what he gets.

And if you’re him, here because she sent you: she still wants this to work. Start there.

If you’re ON YOUR OWN

Divorced, single, or three dates into something you’d rather not wreck.

Whatever ended the last relationship is all packed up and ready to go for the next. And until you get into the weeds of where it comes from and how it rules your life from the shadows, it will forever be your relationship burden.

It’s the same work. We just do it before she arrives, instead of after she’s stopped talking to you.

ABOUT

I'm Nic. Australian, living in Amsterdam with my wife Sarah and our two boys.

For years I had a life that looked right on paper. Good career, a marriage, plenty of mates and fun times. I held it together with drugs, booze and porn, which works about as well as pegging a tent down with sausages.

Then it all unravelled. I ended up travelling for three and a half years exploring the world and the different healing modalities that would help realign me with the parts of myself I had lost. Until one day I ended up in a room full of men.

I've since spent the last decade working with men. Thousands of them. These days it's mostly husbands and fathers, because that's what I am, and my marriage is where I get found out.

WORDS OF TRANSFORMATION

Testimonials

SIX MONTHS, YOU AND ME

Twelve calls.

WhatsApp voice message access in between.

We work on what is happening both at home and internally. The fight you had on Sunday. Why you stopped initiating intimacy. The sex you want but don’t have. How you swore you would never be like your father, and yet you somehow cannot stop it. Your core childhood wounds and how your woman triggers them perfectly. Your shadows. Your unconscious patterns. Your lack of alignment with life and the heavy burden you carry that you don’t know what to do with.

€5,000, or six payments of €900.

I take twenty men a year.

FIREKEEPER

A multi-year facilitator training in the art and science of transformational men's work. For the man who wants to lead from his depth, facilitate powerful experiences, step into his purpose, and offer his deepest gifts in the world.